What makes a strong character?

Have you ever immersed yourself in a story, you like a character, and then you toss the book across the room with an exasperated sigh? Simply because a character did something they would never do. And I ask you this: is it against the character’s grain given the events of their fictional creation, or is it from you imprinting your own expectations, your own personality, and your own wants upon the character?

In our society, people often confuse strength with power. Strength comes from right action, doing what is right given what you think and say. Power comes from doing whatever you dare regardless of your beliefs. These are the people who’s actions are always questioned, usually frowned upon, and easily turn villain. I think of Socrates in example. He was given the chance to leave. No one wanted his death, they just wanted him to get out of town and stop teaching. Power, for him, would have been leaving and continuing to spread his knowledge. Yet, he understood, if he left, it would betray every word he had ever spoken. So, he drank Hemlock. That is strength.

Now, this dialogue I share with you stemmed from a discussion I held with a colleague. While reading a scene from the novel I’m still rewriting (will it ever see light?) she didn’t agree with the reaction of a character.

Background–the protagonist is a boy who was raised solely by his mother, and within my world, they share a deep bond. For the first time in their lives, they are separated when the boy starts training as a knight. The mother fears what his life will become, and a few years later, she receives the news her son is on the verge of death. Upon hearing these words, the mother has a strong visceral reaction. Her skin pales and she nearly faints. This is the fear she’s held in her heart all her life.

My colleague felt this wan’t a proper reaction since a strong, female character wouldn’t display weakness. And I had to think upon this for some time.

When I write a character, I construct them from within. Meaning, I think of their life. How they grew up, what they believe, how they act, etc. And wether they are male or female, their actions will always be based on the culmination of their life events.

For some reason, I’ve been speaking about expectations a lot this week, but if you have not gathered it, I don’t have them. Life cannot be viewed for what it is with them, and will only be seen for what you desire it to be. It is the same with people. Humans are capable of strength, weakeness, vulnerability, tears, hate, or any other trait you can ponder. These are not attributes limited to either sex, despite what our society would have you believe.

Now, coming back to my colleague’s comment, I decided the mother’s reaction was proper given her life. I will not betray her charcter to present the antithesis of perceived notions of society. I will not hand her power. She instead has strength, for two reasons: it is a proper action given what she thinks and says, and more important, I believe there is no shame in expressing emotion.

Emotion is what makes us human. It is what makes life worth living, and why should we limit our emotions because someone in power says we shouldn’t feel something? In the short of it, the reason for this post, don’t allow others to shape your ideas of how people should act. Anyone is capable of anything regardless of what is between their legs.

Advertisement

Story vs. Form

I think as writers, the thing we lose sight of more often is what readers desire. People read or watch movies for the story itself and not the form (for the most part). The form being the mechanics and the tidbits, and some people will prefer all the flashy stuff over subtext–that is fine. But honestly, I have a hard time believing someone will put down a book and say, “Wow! What superb use of punctuation and grammar.” I’m not saying this isn’t important, but compared to the story itself, it takes a backseat. And writers can spend too much time agonizing over what is considered proper or accepted.

The story is essential. It is everything. If you cannot present a captivating tale, with a vivid world and characters, no one will even bother to find out if you can write properly. Your book will be discarded. And if you write with perfect grammar, follow every rule, and never show an ounce of imagination, your work will become sterile; your story will be lost in yawns.

And this transcends to any medium. For example, a couple years back, the video game Rage was released, and I was pretty excited to play it. I have always held a fascination for post-apocalyptic stories, and this one looked sweet. The story is thus: an asteroid is coming towards earth, and to survive, arks are created to be buried deep in the earth with people in cryo-sleep. So, the game starts off with your main character awakening 106 years after impact, and immediately you are attacked by Mad Max style bandits and saved by some duder voiced by John Goodman.

Now, the game itself had wonderful mechanics and tidbits. Beautiful graphics, great game play, interesting side quest and characters. However, the story–the reason for playing–was horrendous. The character outright accepts that the ‘Authority’ is bad without question, and all the free settlers are the good guys. Then you go on quests to help these people, and no where along the way do we really find out why the Authority is bad, other than a few scattered allusions. There isn’t even a main villain to fight. You just steal some trinket and game over. WTF! is what I said.

Sure, the game followed the accepted mechanics of creating a video game, but in the end, it will not be remembered (at least by me). Why? There is no substance. It is just a shiny cover with nothing inside.

So, write for the story first. Worry about the mechanics later. I have said this before, I will always say it: follow your instincts. If you write something because you feel the tingle of inspiration, you have probably struck gold, and it may not follow accepted methods of writing nor may it be what is popular. But damn it all, don’t ignore your inspiration.

Anywho, enough of this. Write and write with passion.

Could have been an awesome story. Epic Fail.

Who said English wasn’t confusing?

Which direction did that witch go to get my sandwich? I should have told her, order two, and don’t let the chef put too much mustard like last time–a dash of thyme is welcome. And I hope she didn’t wear that stupid hat where she’s going; I wouldn’t if I were her. I wanted to go there myself, but their cashier annoys me, and they’re never gonna find a nicer one. Oh, well.

English is weird! I’ve been using it for some time, well, English and Bad English, and even today, I find it odd. Sometimes, it’s like trying to tell a person born blind what blue looks like. To me, communication is the most important thing in a relationship. And here is the rub: just because two people speak the same language, it doesn’t mean they understand each other.

Language is a living organism, always changing, and it is effected by time, religion, creed, sex, age, location, social status, and so much more. A word I use today may have a completely different meaning five years from now and another in ten. English doesn’t make things easy with the amount of rules and what not. It is a miracle we’ve gotten so far.

So, how does one communicate. Clarity and patience. It is not enough to use words, but we must place ourselves in the shoes of another. How do they perceive you and what you say? This may be achieved through clarity and patience. When using words that may have several meanings, be sure your syntax reveals the intention of the word, and if a person displays confusion, don’t cast blame or call them ignorant. Patiently inquire what they don’t understand, or, rephrase your words using alternate choices in vocabulary. It’s not like English doesn’t have enough synonyms.

Anyways, how does this apply to writing and literature? Well, that should be evident. Pick up some Shakespeare and see how the language was 400 years ago. It’s readable, but requires some knowledge. Imagine how your literature will look to humans another 400 years from now. They might need a dictionary too.

When writing your story, clarity is one of the most important things you can strive for. I am an advocate for writing the first draft as fast as possible and with little thought. This allows for the creative instinct to shine. But writing is like a sculpture. A block of clay is placed before you, big chunks removed, and little by little, it is slowly refined to bring forth amazing art. So, be patient with your own work as well. Give it time. Craft it, mold it, and ensure that it will stand the test of time.

Anywho, I’ve rambled for long enough…

Same old stories with a twist

They say there are no original stories, they’ve all been told. What’s a writer to do then? That’s easy. Take a familiar story and change it up, twist it around until it is totally different and unique again. That seems to be the trend right now in books and movies.

Hook

This weekend I watched Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters and Warm Bodies. I review the movies on my blog. H&G isn’t so much a twist on the familiar fairy tale as it is a continuation. It answers the question of what these poor children did after they killed the witch. They became witch hunters, of course. Another continuation story I love is Hook, although that story could also fall under the What If category. What if Peter Pan grew up? Robin Williams is excellent as the grown-up Peter Panning, by the way.

Fairy tales are perfect stories for adjusting because almost everyone already knows the original tales. The characters are familiar and the plots ingrained in our memories, thanks in part to Disney. Changing the setting, or genre, or point of view of the original makes the same old fairy tale new and exciting again. Sometimes the author and/or director can make the adaptation work, such as Red Riding Hood, and sometimes it bombs, like in Beastly. I liked him so much better as the Beast.

One of the most retold plots isn’t a fairy tale, really. Romeo and Juliet has been a big redone a million times (not an exact figure), because it works. One of my favorites is West Side Story. I still cry whenever I hear the song Somewhere. And the latest version is Warm Bodies. I absolutely loved the zombie aspect, very timely. Shakespeare’s work has been modernized to great success. I will never tire of watching 10 Things I Hate About You. The Taming of the Shrew was brilliant originally but the modern twist made it more relatable to today’s audiences—and freakin’ hilarious!

I don’t know about you, but every time I leave a movie theater of finish a book, I always ponder how I would write it differently, how I would change it to be my own. So don’t worry about writing a story no one’s ever read before because that ain’t gonna happen. But you can find a way to freshen up an old classic. Find a plot hole in your favorite story and plug it up with your own vision. Ask what if? Put the characters in a totally different world and see what happens. Swap the good guys and bad guys. What if  Cinderella wasn’t as sweet and innocent as we’ve been lead to believe? Maybe Robin Hood only stole to cover his gambling debts? Who knows? The possibilities are endless.

What are your favorite twisted-up classics?

Writing Graphic Horror as a Public Service

“What the hell are you talking about?” you ask, incredulous at the ridiculous and counter-intuitive title you just clicked.  Horror, especially the graphic sort, is a public menace that desensitizes us to negativity.  In the war between good and evil, positive and negative, light and dark, extreme fiction pulls us out of balance in a direction we should not tread.

This, my friends, is horse manure.

Like any other symbolic product, art that draws on the dark, the nasty, the gruesome, and the violent is received by different audience members in a variety of ways.  I know this because I have experienced horrific art in ways different than others assumed that I would. The idea that because I like something you see as negative means I glorify or support negativity is false.  Personally, I feel like I’ve taken positive lessons from extreme art.

By way of example, let me take you back to my teen years.  Yes, the dreaded 1980s.  Big hair, parachute pants, actual arcades.  The decade was awash in all kinds of subcultural sounds, from pre-Goth, depressing New Wave stuff to dudes in make-up party rock.  Me, I dug on thrash.  Metallica, Megadeth, Anthrax, and of course, Slayer.  You would be correct to assume, with names of that sort, that these bands didn’t exactly sing happy songs.  And as part of the subculture that worshiped these bands, I had many a devil and skull on my bedroom walls.  The thing was, I never took it as bad because I was never a bad person.

So imagine my surprise when one day, based on the Slayer tee I wore, I was accused of being a Nazi.  Turns out, a lot of people thought that the band glorified the Third Reich and supported their ideology.  And maybe they did.  There was certainly some Nazi imagery in the artwork the band chose.  The biggest reason people thought that, however, was because of one of the bands most popular songs, Angel of Death.  The song is about Josef Mengele, and approaches the notorious doctor by singing graphically about his gruesome medical experiments during the Holocaust.  The lyrics pull no punches. They are graphic and nasty. And they are likely in the realm of truth in depicting what this monster actually did.

Now, I freely admit that I did (and still do) really like this song.  The music is fast and the subject matter appeals to my sense of the macabre.  But, I never liked it because it glorified Mengele and the Nazis.  In fact, as gruesome as some of the lyrics were, they are actually presented in a value neutral sort of way.  They come off more as a list of facts.  When I heard the song, I never thought the band was holding Mengele up to be emulated.  I actually took the song to be on the side of the victims.  I took it as an illustration of horror and terror brought down on innocent people, and I tended to empathize with them.

The song sensitized me to the horrific.  The opposite of what many believe horror does.

That influence carries over into what I write today.  I choose, at times, to rub my readers faces in nastiness because I want them to feel it in a visceral way.  No doubt, sexual violence makes frequent appearances in what I write.  But I don’t write it for the purpose of titillation, though I’m aware a small percentage of readers will be titillated.  And I don’t write it just to shock.  I write it because it’s a prominent part of our culture and I want people to engage with it, understand it, and work to integrate the impulses that cause it.  I want to sensitize the reader to the horror a victim experiences so that they will empathize with them.  Hopefully that empathy becomes part of the way they approach the world.  And, I want to sensitize the reader to the darkness that might lead someone to victimize someone in that way.  I want people to empathize with the perpetrator because he is us and he won’t go away by ignoring him. Perhaps that sensitivity will lead to solutions.

Does graphic horror desensitize?  In a world where drone strikes are discussed as body counts and dead innocents are referred to as collateral damage, I think maybe we’d be more sensitive if our noses were rubbed in the smell of burned fleshed and the gore of shattered bodies a little more often.  Go watch graphic scenes of torture in films like Hostel or Martyrs and see if you can still stomach the idea of “enhanced interrogation” or still think it’s okay to farm out information gathering to nations with less restrictive rules.  Irreversible does not make me want to victimize women.  It makes me, by engaging my primal emotions, want to resist their victimization.

So go on out there and fight desensitization.  Get elbow deep in the gutter.  Imagine the out of control.  Empathize with the light by entering the darkness.  Write some extreme fiction.  It can be a public service.

What must they think of me?

I’m a nice guy. I like fuzzy critters, love my wife, and get all squishy when I think of my first child who is on the way. I can watch a Disney flick and feel uplifted or a comedy and laugh. Friends are awesome, and I live for a good hug.

But I have a dark side.

Despite my sweet disposition, I’ve always been pulled toward the shadowy, lurid, and nasty in literature. Don’t ask me where my fascination with the horrific comes from because I can’t tell you. I do know it’s been there as long as I can remember. My favorite book as a child, the one that now haunts me in implication, was an obscure Dr. Seuss with a melodramatic black and red cover. The 500 Hats of Bartholomew Cubbins is a simple story really. A poor boy in a long ago kingdom must remove his hat in respect for the king. Unfortunately, every time he takes his hat off another appears on his head. Well, there’s a serious downside for young Bartholomew. People who don’t remove their hats for the king get their heads chopped off. Green Eggs and Ham it ain’t. Why was I drawn to such a dark tale? I don’t know. My attraction just is.

Now, the biggest problem with loving horror is that most people don’t. They wonder why you want to feel bad when you read. Or they think you perverse as they imagine you entertained by death and gore in the same way they are entertained by American Idol.  Being a horror junkie is right next to porn perv on many people’s list of, “What the heck is wrong with you?” It can really get a gorehound down.

With reading, it’s not a huge problem. Reading is private. Reading is safe. When I’m asked about the nature of the book in my hand, a simple, “It’s horror,” is enough to send the majority of folks on their way with just a vague feeling of unease. And if they stay? Well then, they’re probably my people. They’ll get why I keep a list of the best, most awful books I’ve ever read (Jack Ketchum’s The Girl Next Door tops it, by the way). The point is, when reading there’s only minor risk of judgment.

Writing is a whole different animal.

Your writing marks you in a way that reading does not. The words on the page are yours. They are fed by your experience, cobbled together in your mind, depend on your fingers for their existence. Yours. And when people judge it, they point a finger squarely at you. When I present images of torn panties and severed heads, strangled pets and devoured infants, incestuous mothers and child beating babysitters, well, I’m forced to own them. And there is risk in that. People conflate artist and art. Sick art means a sick mind, and illness makes many close the door. When I present my work I tend to wonder, “What must they think of me?”

But here’s the thing. Not everyone sees the art as sick, twisted, and wrong. I’ve had the same depiction of sexual assault derided as disgusting fantasy and praised as aggressively feminist, and I’ve had the same gore soaked scene called excessive and tame.

And therein lies safety.

Art only belongs to the artist until the moment it’s released to the world. From that point on, it belongs to the audience. It doesn’t matter if I intended a tale of bloody infanticide to create rumination on the nature of evil or just to shock the hell out of people. Once the audience has it, the rumination is theirs, the shock is theirs, the judgment is theirs. If they think your work is brilliant it’s because it appeals to something in their head, their heart. Alternatively, it’s their sense of perversity that makes your story excessive, not your excess as an artist. People may be angry at your story and furious at you for writing it, but that affront is their responsibility. The writer generates. Interpretation belongs to the audience.

So, here’s my advice on the choice to write extreme fiction. Be a channel for the stories that choose you as parent and stay secure in your own sense of who you are and what you intend. If you think you’re the next Richard Laymon, go for it. Forget about judgment. It’s out of your hands.

When should we listen, and when should we speak?

A while back, Steve Yeager provided some superb advice on how to accept the critiques of your peers (Accepting Critiques with Grace) but what I would like to present is this: where do you draw the line in accepting feedback and sticking with your instinct?

I’ve been with Stonehenge for little over a year, and I have grown so much as a writer due to the feedback of this group, which ranges in age, genre, and perspective. If you are lucky enough to find a spectacular gang of writer’s, you cannot argue the benefits of seeing things from people who are not family or friends. But even then, you may not agree with all points of view or you may. Ultimately, it is up to the writer how they effect change within their story based on feedback.

For the sake of argument, let us say, out of ten people reading your work, all ten provide outstanding advice. Should you implement every change offered? Does the story remain yours? Or do you filter through the ideas and use them, tweak them, or disregard them?

I would like to share a quote from a writer, both lyrical, literature, and screenplay, who has had a profound influence on my life, Mr. Nick Cave: “All of the great works of art, it seems to me, are the ones that have a total disregard for anything else; just a total egotistical self-indulgence.”

I’m in no way saying don’t listen to any feedback or advice, but Cave brings up a valid point to consider. Many of the changes to my novel, which really spiced it up, have come from outside perspectives. But there comes a point when you need to trust your instincts, speak to your own heart and purpose, and soar with your own wings. A sentence may not be grammatically correct, or may have odd word choices, but it really has soul and meaning, to you, and everyone says change it. Do you? Or do you stick with your guns?

A writer’s group, select group of friends, or any other form of critique group will very much help you get to a higher echelon of writing, or art, and what I ask is, are you creating for you or others? Like any form of art, it takes years of discipline and practice to fine tune your style, and in the same arena, you must develop your own ear and instinct for feedback. Regardless of which methods you choose, always remain true to yourself, but always approach everything with an open heart, an open mind, and the rest will come…

Finding Your Mojo

In the many Facebook wall posts, individual blog entries and Meet-up discussions I’ve seen in the short time since the New Year began, I’ve noticed a theme among all of them; “I need to start writing again” or  “I can’t find my motivation,” or “I just have to force myself to write.”

I too have felt the burning desire to get back to writing and, have also experienced the disappointment of not being able to get rolling the way I want to. Rather than disappoint myself into defeat by cracking the whip on my own back, or by setting unattainable goals, I decided to take a step back and just allow myself to grow naturally.

It all started with the first step – deciding which of the three stories that I am currently developing to start with. This in itself may not be an easy choice for some. I decided to work on the rewrite of my completed Erotic Romance novella. I had finished the first draft back in July and have recently received some feedback on the first two chapters from members of Stonehenge, my  Meet-up^TM writer’s group, so I felt it was the story that I had the best chance of doing anything with successfully.

The second step was what many folk are having a difficult time with right now. Finding time. I found some time, one hour every morning where I had no distractions, no interruptions and a quiet atmosphere to work in. So I began the rewrite. It wasn’t a very large block of time, but it was something.

The first day I produced a paltry 374 words in that hour. Oh – whoopee! Atta-boy David! You’ve got a good first paragraph (exaggeration – it was really about 5 paragraphs). Needless to say, I was less than exuberant with my results. But then I just had to tell myself that it was a step forward. It was progress after all. Why berate myself on not being able to pen half a book in one hour? It was a success!

Day two was much better. In that one hour window, I had added to my initial 374 words to reach 1100.  Still not a big leap forward but forward progress nonetheless.

Day three I broke 1000 new words in one hour. That was a lot! I was quite proud of myself for the first time since I did 8000 words in one day when finishing the first draft. I looked forward to the next day’s hour with great expectations.

Day four – another 1000 word hour and the story was actually flowing nicely as well. Realizing that my efforts weren’t just creating dribble, that one thousand words in an hour made me feel very good about myself. Again, I looked forward to the next day.

Day five, six and seven have all seen 1000+ word days in that one hour window of opportunity. Something is happening. I’m writing! How can this be? I didn’t even feel stressed or hurried over the past week. I’ve actually got something on paper (well, pixels at least) and it wasn’t the drudgery that I thought it would be. I sort of forgot that I had to write and just wrote.

That’s the trick. Stop telling yourself that you have to write, like it’s a job. Most of us are still doing this as a “hobby” in conjunction with our real jobs, so why make it a task when it should be fun?

Taking that one step further – why feel the need to sit and write for hours on end? Write when it feels good and for as long as it feels good and the work flows. When you hit a hurdle, pause for a moment and try to think it through. If the answer doesn’t come immediately to you, put it down and go do something else. I have found that in working this way, I get through stumbling blocks much easier than I used to. When you are in the heat of the moment, and you come upon a problem, one part of your mind is saying “screw it! I have to get this other information down” while another part fights the first and says, “No! We must solve this problem first BEFORE we go on. The fate of the free world depends on it!”

Both are right to some degree, and if you can skip ahead and continue writing then come back to whatever is hanging you up, then go for it. I have the tendency to get marred down in trying to solve a problem, the result of which is I get frustrated, angry, disenchanted and begin second guessing everything about my story. I get stuck in other words. No one likes that feeling and it is probably why many of us find it difficult to get started after a break. We don’t want to feel that way.

The baby step approach I’ve been describing above has helped me find my groove. I work, not expecting much, but end up achieving a lot. When I feel good, I write. When I am stuck, I walk away and think about it. Usually, I can work through my problems and at the next one-hour writing window, I can implement changes and move on, many time still achieving a 1000 word hour. But the most important thing that helps me maintain this one-hour-a-day schedule is that I feel good and am looking forward to writing. If you can’t feel good about what you’re writing, or even look forward to your writing time with enthusiasm – what’s the point? There’s enough stress dumped on you by life, why dump more needlessly?

I don’t even pretend to assume this method will work for everyone, but it’s working for me right now. So much, in fact, that I’m inspired to share my workflow with the hope that I might be able to help or inspire someone who’s experiencing the same difficulties in finding their happy place.

If you find this has helped you, let me know. If you have a method you find helps you get through the muddy trail, share it here. You might just help me or someone else in the process.

 

Happy writing.

Reading goals for 2013

To become a better writer, I am challenging myself to become a better reader. In the past, my reading time was limited between my son’s at-bats during his little league games and waiting in the car to pick my daughter up from band practice. So you can imagine that not a lot of books were completed. This year, I resolve to change that. Now, I’m not going to promise to read 100 books, or even one a week. I gotta have some time to take care of my three kids and write my next novel, Lip Smacked. But reading for an hour before bed every night is a realistic goal I can achieve. Whether I read a YA urban fantasy, books on writing or tackling a classic, I will read every day. And some time during the year, I will finish reading The Count of Monte Cristo because according to Matt and Kody, it’s freaking awesome! Yeah, we’ll see.

In addition, I’d also like to read all of Neil Gaiman’s books. Why Neil Gaiman, you ask? Because he’s hot and looks like he could be Severus Snape’s younger brother. (And if you don’t know who Severus Snape is, I really feel sorry for you.) Plus, Neil’s just an all-around cool guy. Right now, I’m reading Coraline to my five-year-old daughter, Angela, so that will soon be crossed off the list.

What are you planning to read this year?

Hold Me To It!

January 25th! This is the date I plan to have my beta copy of Eyes of the Eidolon out in print. No. Not “plan to.” Will.

Stonehenge has inspired me over the years to rewrite this manuscript several times over – each marked by significant improvement. At the end of each, I found myself asking, Is it good enough now?

The answer became apparent in the form of subsequent rewrites…

After finishing the first draft of this manuscript, I felt I was not yet a writer, but I didn’t know how to improve. I couldn’t understand the differences between my manuscript and the published works of those many professionals who spent years developing their craft. Fortunately, I found my critique group – Stonehenge. They massaged me with hot coals, diced me up with samurai swords, pounded me with meat hammers, but yet, they never left a bruise. Their honest words, kind encouragement, and realistic critiques allowed me to grow and understand those differences I lacked.

And so, the rewriting commenced. First draft, second draft, third draft, and fourth. Mind you, the original manuscript was 214,000 words. Fifth draft, sixth draft, and now seventh. I read books about writing, then wrote more. I listened to podcasts, then wrote again. I read books outside my succor, analyzed classic literature, studied genres of today, and learned through hard work, time, dedication, and by forcing my mind open to the thoughts of others. I attended writers conferences, met with agents, publishers, editors, and authors…

Now, I know my writing is publishable. The core story remains the same, but every aspect of this manuscript has changed for the better.

Why so many drafts? What was I thinking? I attribute this partially to my perfectionism, partially to my love of writing, and partially to the inspiration of my writers group and friends. But here’s the answer. After finishing the last words of every draft, I read the beginning and found myself saying, (aloud mind you), “Ugh, this is crap!”

Was it crap? I don’t know – I think the first few drafts were, but I continued believing this because I had learned so much over the course of rewriting each version. When I started rereading each, it was ridiculous to think this thing was publishable. Yes, I was down on myself and depressed. I tried to stay positive, but at times it proved nearly impossible. But the love of writing inspired me to continue my goal of perfection. And now I realize, writing is an art. It cannot be perfected. And I must say – as a perfectionist – this idea was very challenging to overcome.

Am I still improving? Yes! And always will! I will never be better than my potential, and this idea does not, nor ever will, depress me. It does not weigh me down. It thrills me. It testifies that I can always improve, that I can always be better than I am now.

But the acceleration of growth has reduced. I reread my last draft and thought to myself, This is pretty good! It’s not perfect, nor will it ever be, but for the first time, I am satisfied with it. I am satisfied with the writer I’ve grown into. I know my voice, have a definitive style, and understand so much more than I thought possible.

January 25th! Hold me to this promise. Bug me. Prick me with red pens until I turn black and blue. The paper copy of Eyes of the Eidolon will be available to my beta readers by this date. I look forward to your unique perspectives, inspiring views, careful hands, and final words. Thank you all for the gift of learning.